Despite being very sleepy yesterday, Mom still managed to have a good day. There was a little confusion (she admitted on her part) Thursday night so she ended up getting her nighttime meds very late (to be honest, I’m not 100% sure that she got them at all). The day ended well though. I took her to the dining room and we had dinner together. I think she’s starting to enjoy that part and is looking forward to meals outside of her room where she can interact with other residents if she wants to.
This weekend is going to be a test for her. Actually, both this weekend AND next weekend. We won’t be able to spend the usual amount of time with her. Today I will be headed to DC to participate in the Overnight walk (yes, I will literally be walking ALL NIGHT). Chad is finishing up things at mom’s place so we can prep it for the sale. Tomorrow we’re dropping Sam off at one of her camps, which is 3+ hours each way. I’m pretty sure we’ll be able to see her tomorrow evening, but it’ll be the longest stretch for her to go without seeing either me or Cyndie. Next weekend is similar – a drive up on Saturday to pick up Sam only to turn around on Sunday to drop her at another camp even farther away. Mom is doing very well now and knows what her restrictions are when it comes to eating. She even requested her soup to be thickened last night without us prompting her to do so. I feel pretty good about leaving her alone, although I hope her care associates encourage her to mingle in the open areas and not stay in her room.
She did make a comment yesterday about how she’s “been good” and that she’s proud of herself. I know what she’s referring to. She wants so desperately to do things on her own and be able to walk, especially to the bathroom. Oh, the things we take for granted!! But – she knows that she’s not capable of doing that yet and if she tries she could actually cause more harm. In the very beginning we had to worry about mom getting out of her bed or the wheelchair because she just didn’t want to be there and I don’t think fully understood what deficiencies she had. When you talk to her, it’s become clear that she understands that this is a process. The improvements aren’t happening as quickly as she would like but I think she’s more accepting of the pace as others continue to tell her how great she’s doing.
Every now and then I have moments of complete disbelief that this is my mom. How and why did this happen to her? These are the same questions I know she has asked herself and ones that I have answered for her. It’s not her fault. She didn’t do anything to cause this. It can happen to anyone. God isn’t punishing her…. But still. She’s my mom. The strongest lady that I know. Completely independent. Has overcome adversity and challenge. Built a life for herself with virtually no one to help her. No matter what, finds ways to care for others. As a matter of fact, at dinner last night she told me that when she gets better she wants to come back and volunteer one day a week. She sees the workers running around like crazy trying to get to everyone and she understands how residents feel having to wait. My mom knows that she can make a difference. I love that she’s making plans like this. My mom has no idea what this experience is doing for herself and for others. Closeness and more communication among families, priorities shifting, health being taken more seriously, more kindness and patience being spread… At least this is what I see among my closest inner circle. I hope that’s something you’re experiencing too. If not, why don’t you be the spark to initiate the change?