The Better You Get, Seems the Worse Things Are – Thursday, June 22

I’m sorry that it’s been so long since my last update!

Let me just start off by saying that mom is doing GREAT! She’s eating more, getting out more, and is continuing to get stronger everyday. She has been standing, reaching, working on taking steps (not often, but once in awhile) and her mood has generally been much improved. She laughs more than she cries, which is hardly at all as a matter of fact. She has a few people here that she looks forward to seeing and even has a couple of inside jokes with them.

Here’s where things get tricky. Forgive me if I’ve already covered this in a previous post…

When you are less critical, healthcare declines and visits become more infrequent. What do I mean by that? When you’re in the ICU or in a more questionable state, people *HAVE* to pay more attention to you in case there is some kind of situation that arises. The hospital (or center, or wherever you are) will put their top people on your case because they are the ones that can handle it. They keep a better schedule. They take more time with you. They seem to care more. Once you’re “out of the woods” so to speak, here comes the B Team, C Team, or even the XYZ Team. It really shouldn’t be that way. Some people are horrible at their job and others are just mean. I really don’t understand people with certain personality traits and a lack of compassion that get into healthcare. It’s truly mind-boggling.

Friends that used to come around visit less often. It’s sad, but it’s a fact of life. Everyone is busy and they have their own lives. People go out of their way in the beginning because they don’t know if they’ll ever see you again. Some show up because they want to tell everyone how they were there (sad but true). I was telling someone the other day that right now is the hardest because mom is doing well enough that she doesn’t need constant supervision but she needs something to do. Yes, she does therapy a couple of hours a day, but only during the week. Yes, she does get to go to the dining room to eat now and she participates in a few activities here and there. But for the most part, she gets BORED. It was almost easier when she was in the ICU because she wasn’t talking and spent most of her time sleeping. Now we have to try and find things to talk about and do, and it is hard. I am still here every day. Thankfully I can work remote so most of my time is spent with her, but not WITH her, if you know what I mean. When her friends, R and H, come to visit I get to take that opportunity to run home and do laundry, go to the store, get a haircut, etc. It’s a little funny – there was a group of people at the beginning of all of this that wanted me to keep her closer to her neighborhood so that they could take turns helping to watch her and take care of her. I fought to keep her nearer to me since I knew I’d be visiting her the most. I’m so glad that I did. Those that actually got angry with me for not keeping her near her old place haven’t seen her in over a month. So much for that, eh?

So, the regular “brat pack” will continue visiting mom regularly. Of course others are more than welcome to come. I know she’d LOVE to see those she hasn’t seen in awhile. For any that want to come see her that she hasn’t seen since she got sick, just be warned that there might be some tears. It’s OK though. There really isn’t anything to be afraid of when you come visit. Oh – and if you DO – she has changed rooms. She’s now in room 134. But you can ask around. Most people are getting to know her. 🙂